Super U Podcast | 7 Super Tips with Mindy Kaling
Vera Mindy Chokalingam, known professionally as Mindy Kaling, is an American actress, comedian, writer, producer, and director. She first gained recognition starring as Kelly Kapoor in the NBC sitcom The Office (2005–2013), for which she also served as a writer, executive producer, and director. For her work on the series, she was nominated for a Primetime Emmy Award for Outstanding Writing in a Comedy Series and five times for Outstanding Comedy Series. Kaling gained wider attention for creating, producing and starring in the Fox comedy series The Mindy Project (2012–2017). She created the NBC sitcom Champions (2018), also appearing in five episodes, the Hulu miniseries Four Weddings and a Funeral (2019), the Netflix comedy-drama series Never Have I Ever (2020–present), and the HBO Max comedy-drama series The Sex Lives of College Girls (2021–present).
5x #1 Bestselling Author and Motivational Speaker Erik Qualman has performed in over 55 countries and reached over 50 million people this past decade. He was voted the 2nd Most Likable Author in the World behind Harry Potter’s J.K. Rowling. Qualman is also the inventor of the bestselling board game Kittycorn.
Need a sneak peek? Below are the main takeaways from the episode.
Super U Podcast | 7 Super Tips with Mindy Kaling
[4:13] Tip #1
“It’s funny because when a script is great, there’s no praise really because I think I don’t know if you guys have the same feeling about writing but like, praise seems empty, but criticism seems real. So if like, when there’s a really good script, you’re like, okay, yeah, that’s your job to turn in a good script. Great. Now, let’s just do our cursory pass and get it ready for the table read and then a bad script. It’s like so much more like its good parts. Diplomacy, by the way, is something that when you’re one of the angry members of a staff, feeling righteous all the time, you can just Greg would just let you go, like, do whatever you want. But then when you become the boss, you are like, Oh, that that trait when you’re an underling makes you a tyrant as a boss. Like that was one thing is when work isn’t what you want, it’s sort of finding the good in it and doing all those things that you’ve read about in textbooks.”
[5:31] Tip #2
“That’s so nice of you. Because I have met a lot of comedians and have been interviewed by a lot of comedians where there’s this outdated viewpoint of this feeling that you have to be desperately unhappy, and have had like a kind of a bad relationship with your family or everyone around you growing up if you don’t express that in your art. Or if you didn’t experience that and like want to luxuriate in that but you’re somehow not like legit are the real deal. And I love just breaking that notion because it’s outdated. And it’s like a residual, like from the 80s, early 90s Road comic mentality. But I just love that there’s this new type of comedian.”
[6:22] Tip #3
“Crick’s advice to me that was the most valuable, especially going on to my own show was to be kind. And that might be kind of Mindy specific because I think what makes you professionally successful is not necessarily what makes you personally successful. And what I found has helped me professionally is to be very decisive. And so professionally, I’m not very demure. I know exactly what I want. And I say it now, often when you’re being direct and decisive, it can seem brusque. If you don’t put a lot of disclaimers on when I say when you said to be kind, I think what he mentioned, and this is at least I’ve interpreted it is that it’s fine to be decisive and every woman should be and we shouldn’t go out of our way to be more demure than a male counterpart. I will say though, remembering at that same time, to show kindness to people who are maybe nervous to talk to you and get an answer from you, has been invaluable.”
[7:56] Tip #4
“It is very important to be expressive in so much that no one should ever be stopping you from saying what you need to say, or you should never have that fear. However, I think as a young person, it’s equally important, if not more important, to be perceptive, and to be sensitive. And I feel like we don’t talk about that a lot. Because we feel like the only way to show that we’re empowered is by speaking in. And I think that you know, when I was growing up, I really thought that what my parents taught me was like, I large, I didn’t talk until I was like 15 years old, I was pretty much silent, which no one believes. And it’s because I just was like listening and paying attention to what everyone was saying. And, you know, trying to have a good social IQ, which I think helped me become a really what helped me later to become a writer. And I think that that is the one biggest thing is to really, you know, to listen to others more than necessarily putting such a premium on being able to say what you feel.”
[9:04] Tip #5
“You have to have insane confidence in yourself. Even if it’s not real. You need to be your own cheerleader. Now, because there isn’t a roomful of people waiting with pom poms to tell you, you did it. We’ve been waiting all this time for you to succeed. So I’m giving you permission to root for yourself. And while you’re at it, root for those around you too. It took me a long time to realize that success isn’t a zero-sum game. I thought it might take a second to speak to the ladies in the audience. Guys take a break. You don’t have to pay attention during this part. Maybe you spend the next 30 seconds thinking about all the extra money you will make in your life. We’re doing the same job as a woman pretty sweet. Hey, girls, we need to do a better job of supporting each other. I know that I am guilty of it too. We live in a world where it seems like there’s only room for one of us at the table. So when another woman shows up we think Oh my god, she’s gonna take the one woman spot that was supposed to be mine. But that’s just what certain people want us to do. Wouldn’t it be better if we worked together to dismantle a system that makes us feel like there’s limited room for us? Because when women work together, we can accomplish anything. Even stealing the world’s most expensive diamond necklace when the Met Gala, like an Ocean’s eight, a movie starring me, which opens in theaters June 8.”
[10:39] Tip #6
“I was born with this delusional feeling that I could do anything with even Tim that was instilled in me in my parents. And if you don’t, you’re not lucky enough to have parents who give you outsized confidence as a kid. God because it is girls faced so many challenges, and people are constantly telling them, they can’t do things that can’t be funny, they can’t run companies. That I just I mean, my advice is always just like, not to focus on anyone telling you, you can’t do anything or the politics of your situation. But to just focus on the situation and sort of think of yourself as not a woman, not a minority, not skinny, not whatever. Just think about like your art, or the thing you want to do. Because you can get caught up, I can get caught up, I could spend my entire life doing panels on being a Chevy woman of color writing a TV show, and every one it would be useful to some people, but I wouldn’t be writing my TV show. And all my competition, all the white men who are doing the same thing as me are not doing those panels, they’re just getting better and better and better at their job. And so for me, the only advice I ever give women is like, we want to support each other without distracting each other. And it’s just like, head heads down, work really hard, pretending your parents don’t like you know, they lock you in the third room of whatever and just like do your work.”
[12:17] Tip #7
“I arrived here as a 17-year-old took the lay of the land and immediately began making a checklist of everything I want to accomplish. I told myself that by the time I graduated in 2001, I would have checked them all off. And here’s my freshman fall checklist. Be on hand over crew B and large crew, B and be in an acapella group, be in an improv troupe, write a play that’s performed to the Bentley, do a cartoon for the DEA and tried to be in a cool senior society. Guess what? I completed that checklist. But before you think Wait, why is this woman just bragging about her accomplishments from 17 years ago, people listening? Then I graduated, and I made a new checklist for my 20s Get married by 27. Having kids at 30 wins an Oscar to start my own TV show and host the MTV Music Awards. This was 2001. Guys that made more sense then. And do it all while being a size two. Well, spoiler alert, I’ve only done one of those things, and I’m not sure I will ever do the others. And that is a really scary feeling. Knowing how far I’ve strayed from the person that I was hoping to be when I was 21. So just want to tell you guys, don’t be scared if you don’t do things in the right order. Or if you don’t do some things at all. I didn’t think I’d have a child before I got married. But hey, it turned out that way. And I wouldn’t change a thing. I didn’t think I’d have dessert before breakfast today. But hey, it turned out that way, and I wouldn’t change a thing. So if I could impart any advice, it’s this. If you have a checklist good for you. Structured ambition can sometimes be motivating, but also, feel free to let it go. Yes, my culminating advice for my speech is a song from the Disney animated movie Frozen.”
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The Super U Podcast is hosted by #1 bestselling author and Motivational Speaker Erik Qualman.